Friday, November 19, 2010

'All the women who independent...throw your hands up at me.'

So, the other day I was walking down the street and a random grabbed my butt. Yup. Right in the middle of the main strip of Santo Domingo. I was just chilling with my ipod and some dirty middle-aged man snuck up behind me, groped my ass and kept on walking. I was so shocked that I couldn't think of anything else to do except laugh, (wouldn't be like me not to laugh at the most inappropriate of  moments, would it?) until I felt a massive wave of rage boiling up inside of me. I just wanted to chase the idiot down the street and grab his ass back to see how violated he felt. What an idiot.

After this ridiculous event, I decided that I should probably get a new walk. You know, something a little more intimidating and a little less 'inoccent-little-white-girl'. Hence, I have started walking around with my shoulders slightly tensed back and my fists clenched a little. At least judging by the way I walk, people might think that I'm one of those tough butch chicks.. Little will anyone know that I cannot throw a punch to save my life, and even if I were forced to in order to defend myself, I would probably apologise immediately afterwards...

Now, those of you who know me well know that there isn't much that I am afraid of. However, I have a confession to make- living her in Ecuador makes me a little weary of my safety ('Hallelujiah- she admits that there is danger in the world!'). Coming from someone who used to take the dog for walks at 1am around the streets of Rome, it takes a lot for me to be scared of walking around alone. However, I have been told here- 'DO NOT walk alone after 6pm.'- hence, I have said good-bye to long relaxing walks at night and hello to banging my head against one of the the four walls of my bedroom after dinnertime.

I say all this to say that the re-occuring theme for me this week has been the issue on equality for women. I have come to learn that sadly women do not have many rights and tend to be fairly objectified here in Ecuador. Yes, some of them will dress a little promiscuously, which probably doesn't help the situation, however, that is no free ticket for men to harass them daily. I mean, a girl walking around Melbourne in a short skirt might get a whistle or two, however here she will get winks from 95% of men that pass her, as well as foul comments and possible groping. If I of all the women walking around can encounter such an incident, imagine the hell the pretty girls must go through? It's proving to be quite challenging for me- it's very very frustrating to be stared at and commented on so frequently. Some days it gets to the point where I don't even want to leave the house because I don't know if I'll be able to control my anger. I've stopped brushing my hair and putting on make-up in attempt to stop the wolf-whistling, but it's not really of much use. Even if I were wearing a garbage bag some dirty man would still have something to say about it. Ah well, it's all a part of the experience and it's just another challenge that God has set before me. Sometimes we have no choice but to endure the things that He throws at us- '...we rejoice in our sufferings knowing that suffering produces endurance...' (Romans 5:3).

Next week I will be starting to work once a week with people that live in a really poor community here in Santo Domingo. It's called Laura Flores. I'm going to rock up with my guitar in the hope of delivering a little happiness and hope to it's residents- music does a good job of that. In doing a mini-investigation on the place, I learned that most of the women that live there can have up to 15 children. How crazy is that? They barely have enough money to survive, but they keep popping them out! I imagine that majority of these cases arise from the fact that they have irresponisble husbands who just want to get their freak on and are too lazy (or poor) to be responsible about it. Solution? My first guess was an operation to stop them from getting pregnant. Well- nope, sorry, think again because I have absolutely ludicrous news for you- according to the law, women need an authorisation signature from their husbands to get a tubal ligation at a public hospital. Of course, none of their husbands will agree to such a thing because they simply just don't care, and further, none of them can afford private health care to get it done privately and without having to 'ask for permission'. There goes that idea. How ridiculous. Things like this really make me thankful to be born into the society that repects women and stands for women's rights. They also make me frustrated that I cannot squeeze all the females in the world who haven't been as lucky into a big boat and take them to a place where they can come to know their worth. (Note to self: teach the women at Laura Flores an acoustic rendition of 'Independent Women.')

So these have been my thoughts this week homies. Overall, life is going great here in Santo Domingo. I am rapidly growing attached to the kids from OrphAids, who I visit once a week to play games with. They are so beautiful- I am already dreading leaving them. There is something about being around those children that gives me so much life. Either that, or it's the fact that I get to run around acting like a 10year-old and have a valid excuse....

Love and miss you all,
Love Crissi

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